Author Archive

April 11, 2012

Today is the day after my younger brother Dany and his wife April celebrated their one year wedding anniversary. Congratulations guys!

On Friday, my friend Christen Hughes and I went to get a new wig. The other one was getting worn and tattered. We had so much fun. I got a short cute wig. Matt loves it! :-) We went to a place called hair options. It was a totally awesome place. It smelled of coffee and chocolate when we walked in which immediately made me think of my Mom. It was comforting even though I don’t really like chocolate? I do love coffee though and I love my Mom. The woman who owned the shop, hair options was awesome. She understood that even though she helped turn it into a fun experience, I would much rather have my own hair. I had avoided my eyelashes and eyebrows falling out by just not really touching them. Well I touched them. You know the rest…

Friday night we went to the movies and saw “Hop” with my mother-in-law and our nephew Hudson. It was really cute, but I woke up Saturday with mouth sores again. Probably from touching foreign stuff and then constantly putting my hands in my mouth eating popcorn.

On Sunday we went to Oak Mtn state park. We had a blast! We brought a picnic and ate by the lake. Then we rented a paddle boat which was great exercise for me. Peddling those boats in an actual direction isn’t easy. Matthew jumped off the boat and swam, taking off his shirt and shorts I found a tick had buried his head in Matthew’s arm. Luckily we found it quick and Matt was able to get it off him. Mitchell sat nervously between Matt and I not interested in the water or the fish which were jumping out of the water! The weather was really warm but being on the lake helped cool me down a lot. Had we tried to do this last year the heat would have wiped me out so bad Matt would have had to carry me to the car. This time everything was great! I was worn out, but I did it!


April 3, 2011

Why is it that I write the best blogs ever in my mind, but when I sit in front of the computer… Nothing! Music has a lot to do with it. I can hear a song and suddenly I’m a million miles away lost in thoughts, memories, my future.
We again had a great weekend. Well, week really. I completed my once a week for four weeks labs and now I go once every other week for four weeks. I went and saw Dr Riser my local neurologist Tuesday the 29th. She seemed excited and so happy for me. She said she would do whatever she could to help. This is encouraging. I’m ready to start physical therapy! To get the ball rolling?
I feel so discouraged because I’m not climbing mountains and running marathons. Matt keeps telling me MS had it’s way for almost 8 years. I got some work to do. We ran errands and did stuff all week and on Sunday we decided to go to Toys R Us and just walk around. To a 7 and a 3 year old this is a blast! All of a sudden my legs decided “No More!” I cried the whole way home as Matt consistently said “Hard work Mag!” ~ I guess?


Another stem cell success story…

This story is unbelievable, and inspiring. Notice how the ms society does not currently support this procedure?


March 27, 2011

I have had the best weekend ever! The start of something big! Saturday we went to this playcenter place for the


I walked around the center all day, no problem.  Just holding Mitchells hand.  Like a normal Mom.  Not pushing or holding on to anything?  It was great! Before that,  we shopped at Target where I nervously scooped up a cart as soon as we got there,  but found I didn’t really need it!    My balance seemed great?   Last night we honored Earth Hour from 8:30 to 9:30.   The boys thought it was soo cool with all the power off and only having lit candles that we started about 7:15 and by 9:15 Mitchell looked up at me with droopy eyes and said he was ready for bed!   Matthew wasn’t far behind and to be honest Matt wasn’t much longer after Matthew.      I, on the other hand am trying to break myself of all excess medication. I’ve been off the ambien for about a week now.  I have had a couple nights I probably only got about 2 hours of sleep, but I gotta start somewhere. I also stopped the Provigil. Which gives me energy.  Before it gave me the energy to just get through the day?  Now that my body isn’t fighting a forever battle I should be able to do this!  Today we went bowling!! Mostly gutter balls, but I haven’t had the confidence to even try in years.  Time to “Celebrate Life”!  I started a text message to all my brothers and my sister in utter amazement! Bowling is not something I ever thought I would be able to do again! This is just amazing!


March 24, 2011

I went again to get my blood work done today.   I Thought I had Matt talked into letting me  skip the whole thing this week? (I start working on this one on Monday) Come on, I’m doing it already!   I have an appt with my local neurologist Tuesday!  Matt said the best thing “Would it really be worth it?” And truth of the damn matter is,   No it wouldn’t be worth it.  If  I make this kind of commitment to something I need to finish entirely! This is my future we’re talking about here!

Okay so the last few weeks have been not fun for me just trying to stand on my own after having such intense chemo.  But today, although still a little awkward, I  saw my future.  I wanted to be able to be apart of it and not sit idly by and watch!


March 17, 2011

Today is St Patty’s day and would have been my totally awesome Grandma Bea’s birthday.

Okay, so yesterday was a bad day. I guess I’m gonna have some of those? It’s very discouraging though. The day started out shaky and just went downhill from there. We ran a few errands in the morning. I’m trying to find straight legged jeans that fit me? My walking was a little bad but with the help of the store cart it was okay. Then I went to get my blood drawn. I already go through every excuse in my mind to not have to do it. Then I yell at myself to grow up and get it done. My walking was so bad it was like I never had this procedure done at all!! 3 months of my life…    I needed that stupid rail Matt so lovingly pointed out last week. It was awful, it looked like I was drunk or on drugs! And not the kind of drugs I am on!  I don’t want the looks of pity anymore!!  The sores in my mouth, although getting better, are still there! By dinner time I just had to excuse myself from the table and go into the garage and, well cry. I don’t want to cry in front of my boys because that will just screw them up. My youngest son, Mitchell,  likes it best when I wear my wig which I usually don’t do at home. It’s not comfortable. I wear a hat my sister in law, Amanda bought for me. I’ve never let the boys see my head. Tell me that wouldn’t screw with  a person; seeing your Mom bald. But I always wear the wig in public. I also always try to do my eyes. The head models in the wig shop had major eyes done. I can’t wear lipstick because of the ulcers in my mouth, but maybe I will try again today. Lots of chap stick.  I just don’t feel very pretty. I’m bald and rickety! Whatever… I’ll deal and believe today will be a better day!


March 13, 2011

So, I can’t even begin to tell you guys how awful the mouth pain is! I have mouth sores all inside my mouth and on my tongue. It’s just awful. I called Dr Jain on Friday and he called in what they referred to as “magic mouthwash”.   And it is.  It numbs everything it touches in my mouth. Kinda like when you go to the dentist and they give that you that shot. I can’t really taste anything but the pain is too bad without it. I’ve never had mouth sores and I am being a big baby about this! They hurt like hell! Not good! When will my hair start growing back??? I am ready to be through with all after effects of chemo. This has been a very whiney post but…egh what are ya gonna do?


Another Stem Cell Transplant Story

This is sorta long but if you have the time it is awesome!


March 10, 2011

So we went to get my labs done today, and I am thinking “Really?” you just released me! Dr Jain said ” Now don’t wait until Thursday to get these done!” But I went today…Thursday.

As we pulled up to the hospital Matt is pointing to a railing that I could grasp on to for support all the way to the entrance. He’s always worried about everything. I glanced at the railing, but I’m more stressed about getting my blood drawn. Have I mentioned I hate needles?! I see the railing but I get out of the car and just walk to the front door. No railing, no wall, nothing. So this was big.

I walked into the waiting room filled with people. This used to would have way stressed me, but I sat down a little farther away than I normally would. When they called my name I stood up and walked, NO PROBLEM. Of course, I’m thinking everyone knows that I’m wearing a wig!! I’m not saying I don’t have a ton of work to do still, but it’s a start…


March 8, 2011

So I’m home. I’m so happy. My world is right again. I need to take the time and tell you guys how awesome my parents are! Thank you Dad. More than words Mom… Thank you Mom. We could not have done this without you guys!

My mouth hurts. I am getting sores all inside my mouth. All along my gums. It sucks.

My walking is great! Other than the fact that I don’t know what to do with my arms? I’ve been grabbing walls and furniture for the last eight years? Now what? I don’t feel the need to grab anything anymore! AGAIN I DON’T FEEL THE NEED!!!! This is huge! I don’t have the most perfect balance yet and I have to work out those muscles but I can walk on my own! This makes me very happy.

So to wrap it all up I’m home, My boys rock (I added that part), My parents are the best in the whole world, My mouth hurts, and I can walk!!